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xivanxiety · 6 months ago

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The First & Worst FC (Approx June 2019 - May 2020)

As previously mentioned in my last blog entry, a long time RP friend reached out to me mentioning that he'd started playing XIV and had started an FC. And by started an FC, they'd just started. I was the fifth person to join this FC, so I was officially the first member. This FC eventually grew to consist of people from two different RP communities from two different platforms, so there was a lot of familiar and new faces for everyone. I will need to use names, so I will be naming some of the people in this story after the cast of Mean Girls. Anyway, back to the beginning:

I'm typically pretty shy with groups at first, I like to sit and observe and get a feel for the vibes, I'm also just a quiet person in group settings as other people tend to dominate the conversation. So making friends doesn't come quick for me... typically. However, it didn't take long for Janis to befriend me. I'd say we were pretty attached at the hip. She found a lot of joy in witnessing me go through the MSQ and hearing my reactions to all of the major plot points. She also helped me through a lot of dungeons, trials, etc.

One thing I will note is that Janis did warn me about one of the members in our FC, Regina. She told me that Regina was Aaron's (our FC lead, and my friend from Tumblr) best friend, she had feelings for him, and their characters from their RP community were in a romantic relationship, so she was quite protective of him (I think she meant possessive).

One day, our small group decided to go hang out in Mordona. It was me, Janis, Aaron, Regina, and Glen. We were just shooting the shit and taking screenshots while hanging out in voice. And then as we were sharing the shots we took, Regina blurts out "Katy, why are you staring at Aaron??" I was caught off guard by this, so I simply responded, "I'm... not?" She then hissed at me and said "You're looking at him in all of your screenshots!" I was actually targeting Janis who was standing behind me, so it looked like I was targeting Aaron. I told her "I don't know what to say, I wasn't targeting him." She then let out a deep breath and said "You know what? I just need to chill the fuck out." And left the voice chat. It would appear that either she caught herself in the moment, or someone privately DM'd her telling her to stop which wouldn't have surprised me given future incidents. However, I do believe from that moment on, I was Regina's public enemy #1.

I don't recall a single civil interaction between the two of us and I maintain to this day, I was definitely not an instigator.

Example #1: One day in voice chat, I was helping Janis with pronouncing Korean foods and words. I was talking to Janis but at some point Regina griped, "I know, Katy! I already study Korean so I don't need you teaching me!" Girl, I wasn't even talking to you!

Example 2: She was quick to assume or claim I was being antagonistic in Discord when I was simply engaging in discussion, she'd tell me to calm down and drop it. She was quick to disagree with me in any group chat and treated me like I was being aggressive and antagonistic. ie. I was stating that I wished the Valentione dresses came with petticoat layers in the design because otherwise, it makes no sense why they'd be so poofy. She got on me about complaining over nothing and said they looked fine the way they were. What is wrong with a little critique? I swear, I wasn't allowed to be critical of this game and Yoshi P even in the slightest.

Example 3: One day, another sprout in the FC asked in FC chat what materia they should use for SCH. Regina chimed in telling them not to worry about it, they're not at level cap, much less ready for raids. I asked if she could hypothetically answer the question because I was curious how similar it was to WoW, because a lot of the stats were quite similar and I was a healer main in WoW. Also, Regina was a SCH main at the time. She repeated, "I said not to worry about it!" I then went to Google and looked it up myself and repeated what a few sources online were saying. She responds with "LOL no!" and logged out. The other sprout thanked me for speaking up and answering their question because Regina was starting to scare them.

The final incident (for some time) occurred when I logged into the game one day and dove right into working on the MSQ. I was finally in Shadowbringers and I was eating up the story. Mind you, I was still very much so a sprout. I'd been doing almost nothing but MSQ since I started playing. I do believe this was about... August-ish after SHB came out. We had a new member in the FC, someone who wasn't from either RP communities so we especially wanted to make him feel welcomed. I was running into an issue where I couldn't get past a fight with a few NPCs and was playfully teasing myself in the FC chat. I then quickly realized it was because I hadn't repaired my gear in some time and some of it was broken. Rookie mistake, I know. Regina sees me talking in FC chat and tells me to just go buy some gear off of the market board. I tell her that's too expensive. She then barks back telling me "No it isn't" I then explain I am still leveling so I don't want to waste gil on gear I am going to either replace quickly or can get for free through the MSQ. She then appeared to get fed up and told me to just buy the damn armor. I then went onto explain that it wasn't for a need of armor, I just forgot to repair and now everything is fine. She took it as an opportunity to crack jokes at me and shame me for forgetting to repair my gear. I think she then went and looked me up on the Lodestone or something because then she continued, "WTF are you doing in lvl 82 armor when you're lvl 88?? Go buy higher level gear!" and once again the back and forth about her telling me to go buy armor continued, I told her that even though I'm lvl 88, I am in lvl 82 content (I started SHB at about lvl 86ish, the exact numbers are fuzzy). She continued essentially yelling at me in FC chat but then grew silent and then eventually logged off.

I was then informed by Janis that Regina has been complaining to her and Aaron about me in DMs and they were getting tired of it. Janis told Regina to stop coming to her with her complaints about me as we were friends. And apparently, Aaron had gotten onto her for making a scene in front of our new member and told her she needed to give me a chance or leave. She logged out, and wouldn't log back in for a long time.

The thing is, this character in the FC wasn't Regina's main. She had a main on a completely different DC and tbh, she hardly ever did any content with anyone in the FC except for when Aaron needed help. Otherwise, she'd log in, seemingly check if Aaron was online, maybe say a few things in FC chat, and then log out. She was mostly active in the Discord server.

And for some time, there was peace. We were building structure within the FC. I had become the 'HR' of the FC so to speak and I was also one of the house decorators, having used my own gil to furnish and decorate the place. I felt quite liked by the community. I helped run events and people often confided in me and seemed to feel comfortable coming to me with their issues with the FC. I genuinely liked being there for everyone and playing my part. That was not going to last and it all changed overnight.

I woke up one morning to find that Janis had stepped down as co-FC lead and had promoted Regina to co-lead. And Regina had gone through all of the roles and changed their permissions, and which one received the most lockouts? Mine. I was essentially demoted to just being a member. I couldn't do jack shit, I even lost the ability to drop furnishing items into the FC house. I was not happy and reached out to the admin chat in Discord stating that I couldn't even drop furniture when I was the one who was investing their gil in the furniture. Aaron wasn't happy as he hadn't authorized those changes, to which Regina replied "How was I supposed to know?? I've been gone for months!" Yes! Exactly! You weren't even active with us to begin with. You used your gil you got from your MSQ and level boosts to help pay for the FC, and that was that. She didn't know a damn thing about the community other than when she'd pop into the Discord server and boast about her achievements on her main.

Meanwhile, Janis had started to avoid me. I knew that running the FC was beginning to take a toll on her. She didn't like running an FC, she just wanted to play with her friends. I never got to confirm what her issue was with me, but she never spoke to me again. I do believe Regina had something to do with it because the timing was too coincidental. It became painfully awkward and uncomfortable for me being in the FC. Regina was on a power trip, Janis wasn't talking to me, and Aaron wasn't doing a damn thing to help. Janis and Aaron had been my closest friends. I was quite vocal to Aaron about my dislike for the changes to the FC and I was often the voice for other members who were too afraid to speak out because they too were afraid they'd become Regina's punching bag. We had these farming plots placed in the FC yard, but only Regina was allowed to use them. We were told not to mess with them. One day, one of the members saw that her crystals were ready to harvest, so they gathered them and mailed them to Regina. Her response? She threw a fit in FC chat, told us "Don't touch my stuff!" and removed all members abilities to harvest from the plots.

Meanwhile, Regina continued bullying me, always making passive remarks about me. Anytime I shared a screenshot, she would post 2-3, bumping my screenshot out of view. She always had snide remarks in response to anything I said. I once mentioned that my partner at the time had ordered us Jimmy Johns for dinner, and Regina proceeded to shame me in voice chat claiming I support a man who hunts wildlife in Africa... just because my partner bought me some Jimmy Johns. I had to set myself to DND and turn off notifications on my phone because just any sound related to Discord was giving me anxiety.

Then the Valentiones event came around, the one with the obstacle course you have to run with a partner. A friend of mine, Karen, joked that she and Aaron should run it together. Their characters canonically did not get along, so she thought it would be amusing, besides... it was a joke. Regina did not like this. She pitched yet another fit telling Karen absolutely not, and asked her how would she like it if Regina approached Karen's partner and asked him to run it with her? Regina was constantly forgetting one of the major rules (at that times). Our character's canons did not exist in the FC. There was too much overlappage and we didn't want to deal with petty jealousy. Basically, Aaron's character was actually in a romance with a few characters in the FC. Funny enough, my character was not one of them, and yet for some reason Regina was Hell bent on pushing me out. And this rule apparently did not apply to Regina because she just assumed that Aaron and her character were going to get married and assumed she was his partner in the game. However, over on Tumblr, Aaron's character was starting to eye mine in their story. So it kind of came to no surprise when Aaron decided, due to how Regina was behaving, he was not going to run the event first with her, and instead, asked me to run it with him. I saw no big deal in it, Regina already hated my guts, so I may as well, I otherwise didn't have anyone to run it with. In the moment, I hoped maybe he decided to run it with me because I was not behaving like a brat, but I kind of wonder if he did it to ruffle Regina's panties. Funny enough, Regina didn't have a damn thing to say about it. I assume Aaron had a word with her in private.

But things continued going downhill from there. I had extended an olive branch to Janis asking if we could just talk about why she wasn't talking to me. It was becoming painfully awkward and uncomfortable being in an FC where 2/3 of the people on top did not like me. People I considered friends were beginning to become questionable. Gretchen had once upon a time confided in me because she too felt Regina was on a power trip and she didn't like seeing someone who was so inactive suddenly in control of the FC, meanwhile, she too had been making all efforts to help the FC and felt like she wasn't appreciated. But even Gretchen was starting to hang out with Janis more and speaking to me less. My only two friends left were Karen and Damian, or so, that's how it felt at the time (there were definitely more people on my side in the end). They'd even arrange FC events in secret, definitely without my knowing. I'd be logged in only to check the FC roster to see that most of them were in a group together running maps or FATEs. No mention of it in FC chat or the Discord. But seeing as Janis was often involved in these runs, I was clearly being purposefully excluded, Karen as well. We found comradery in each other as the rejects of the FC. When Karen first joined the FC, Janis asked me to not RP with her as all she liked to do was ERP. She made it a point to say this to everyone she saw getting close to Karen. I took her suggestion with a grain of salt. Yeah, Karen had her flaws, but she was by far the least problematic in the end. This was when I began to wonder "Why the fuck am I still in this FC??"

That was when Karen, Damian, and I discovered it... Balmung. People in the FC had always badmouthed the server, stating it was filled with degenerates. And you definitely don't go to the Quicksands. Well, we wanted to see it for ourselves, so together we went to Balmung. We took a liking to people-watching in the Quicksands. Karen had a thing for a certain race, so she liked to try to chat them up, flatter them, etc etc, never anything serious. One day she spotted a fellow in the distance whose character design she really liked, like... really liked, but she was too shy to say anything. So, I offered to talk to him for her. I sent him a tell letting him know that my friend next to me liked his character design. He took the compliment in stride, but did not appear to take any interest in talking to Karen, but instead chose to talk to me. No, he didn't start hitting on me or anything creepy. In fact, he too was just there to people watch and see who sends him tells.

My time on Balmung encouraged me to start considering diving into RP in XIV. I was beginning to feel more comfortable with just going out on my own and expanding my social circle outside of the FC. Meanwhile, every time Karen and I were spotted on Balmung, people in the FC had things to say, there was a lot of slut shaming going on. I'd swiftly call people out on their hypocrisy because there's no way in Hell some of these people hadn't ERP'd. Aaron especially had art of his character and other people's characters in the act. So what is wrong with Karen, Damian, and I hanging out on Balmung??

Another mutual on Tumblr reached out to me and said I should make a character on their DC and join their FC. They were an RP FC and there was no pressure to make the character my main. So I started a second life on this other DC. It was there that I made one crucial change to my character: Her race. I'd kind of sped my way through character creation the first time around and wasn't 100% happy with her initial design. However, the race and clan I really wanted to be was the exact same as Regina. And I just knew if I changed my character, I'd never hear the end of it. But when I finally made her into what I truly wanted her to be, it was hard to go back to her original design. She was just so cute and my other FC absolutely adored her. They encouraged me to just bite the bullet and fantasia my main, who cares what Regina thought? That FC clearly no longer gave any shits about me. So I did. And sure enough, as soon as I posted a screenshot of my character in the Discord server, Regina had things to say. "Looks like I need to fantasia, one too many (race/clan) in this FC."

The more time went on, the less fucks I gave, and the more I distanced from this FC. I finally decided to have a talk with Aaron. I asked him if there was some issue that people had with me. He tried spinning it onto me and said "I don't know, it sounds more like it's you who has a problem with other people." I asked him to clarify what he meant by that. He then told me I need to be more careful about talking about others behind their backs. To this day I don't know what the fuck he was talking about, because everything I complained about in private to others I told to Aaron himself. I had no qualms about expressing my concerns to him. But I also posed the question, wouldn't that mean there's a great deal of hypocrisy going on then? I never vented to anyone who didn't verbally agree with me. I'm not the type to just dump onto someone without mutual expression of feeling the same way and without valid complaints. I never have problems with people unprovoked. I genuinely never had any issues with Regina in the beginning, it was she who had problems with me and I was beginning to believe that Regina had somehow flipped the narrative. So either way, he was allying with someone who had no issue acting two-faced, and does anyone really want to be friends with someone like that? I later learned that Gretchen had been repeating things I said to Aaron and Regina. I was officially done with this FC. I just needed to wait for a good opportunity and for Balmung to open up.

Meanwhile, I just spent most of my time on Balmung. One fateful day, I was sitting in the Quicksands when some guy started sending me tells. It quickly escalated (on his end) and the dude was asking desperately for my attention and was not taking no for an answer. The guy I'd spoken to for Karen noticed me and asked if I was having any issues. I told him that the other guy wouldn't leave me the fuck alone. He then told me to tell the guy that I needed to go meet with my friends. He then lead me to a different part of Ul'dah where there was a little group of people just sitting and chilling. They were friends and FC mates of his. They weren't RPers, just long time Balmung residents. They were the chillest group of people I'd ever met, and still to this day, remain some of the chillest people I know. They took me in and I began hanging out with them every day. My birthday came around and they showered me with gifts and celebrated with me.

I finally made the move not long after my birthday. Over night I abandoned my house, exited my FC room, said goodbye to anyone who happened to be online at the time, and transferred to Balmung.

Balmung was such a silly place, I don't think it's as bad as a lot of people make it out to be. Upon logging in after transferring, a little lalafell walked up and gave me a hug. I then stepped away from the aetheryte and stumbled upon two people who were in character. One of the characters appeared to be mute and was acting bashful toward my character, like he thought she was really cute, meanwhile his friend was expressing disapproval in me, shaking her head no at him and gesturing that he stop before approaching me and pointing as if telling me to walk away. They didn't really speak to me after that so I assume they were just goofing around. But it was quite the welcome to Balmung.

Aarson of course DM'd me the next day expressing his disappointment in me. He said he wasn't bothered by the fact that I left the FC, but why did I have to go to Balmung?

Years of friendship, dedicated writing partners, invested so much time and energy and gil into your FC, and that's what you have a problem with?

Thank you, next.

The Aftermath

So, I had another character in the FC who I forgot I'd left in there. And I logged in on that alt the day after I left to remove her and also say my goodbyes to people who I didn't get to say goodbye to. Regina was not aware of this. While I was logged into said character, Regina logged in and said in FC chat "Finally, I can breathe in my own FC!" Bitch please.

I'd learn over time that I had more allies in the FC than I initially thought. A number of people reached out and stayed in touch with me, including Gretchen who I ended up softblocking. Another member of the FC tipped me off and told me she was likely just in contact with me to give the FC leaders tea on what I was up to, probably hoping I'd be miserable on my own. I wasn't.

Sometime later, Damian and Karen ended up getting pulled into a voice call and was yelled at by Regina for continuing to associate with me, treating them as though they were guilty of some crime for fraternizing with the enemy. Aaron also sided with Regina on this matter. They then left the FC and went off and started their own.

I was also told that Regina was never physically active within the FC ever again, only in Discord. And Janis eventually took over her position as co-lead again.

Basically, anyone who was a friend of mine in the FC ended up leaving. Besides Gretchen. I named her Gretchen because of the pick-me nature of both individuals. Even Janis left the FC recently. Honestly, I feel as though Aaron was far more antagonist than most would've given him credit for. I think he found joy in how much Regina adored him and how possessive she was and how quick she was to bow down to him. He liked stirring the pot. The RP community that they all came from (I was in the minority from Tumblr) was almost cult like in my eyes. They all placed him on a pedestal and a lot of people develop crushes on him. I'm told he ended up getting together with someone else and married them in-game and of course everyone attended but Regina.

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chrysalispen · 5 years ago

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the smile that you gave me

A gift I wrote for a valentine’s day exchange in my writing discord <3

===

The night sky.

Constellations you know all too well from your own astrology lessons, as viewed through the ornate windows, brace the scintillating spires of the Tower like sprays of diamonds upon black satin. You would never have thought to be so enamored of something so mundane. For a land so nearly swallowed by eternal Light, the return of healing darkness is like a balm over its extensive wounds.

You’re sitting at a small balcony table watching the comings and goings of Crystarium folk (although the pace of their activity is decidedly more sedentary this time of the evening) and enjoying the sight from your vantage point. Across the table sits a familiar face, one that appears curiously unchanged by the passage of time- at least at a glance. There is a careworn look about him that even his physical form, languishing a world away, did not seem to have when last you glimpsed it.

Thancred, your oldest and dearest friend - more than your friend - with whom, in a sense, you have been truly reunited at last. You could think of no one else with whom you’d rather share a quiet evening, and so- here you are.

But he looks… ill at ease, you note. Nervous, in fact, and ever so slightly awkward the more he attempts to mask his anxiety.

Initially naught more than part and parcel of your penchant for casual observation - honed over what has become years of habit - the thought is so jarring that it nearly brings you to a dead stop mid-conversation. Surely not, you think at first. Surely just a flight of fancy, but the fine thread of a tremor you first detected in his voice has not passed. It lingers even within the casual meandering of inconsequential small talk, and you find yourself taken aback for a slight handful of seconds when you realize that you are the cause.

You remember your first meeting with this man - a chance encounter beneath the Sultantree - and his gentle but constant prodding to get you to (eventually) knock upon the door of the Waking Sands. You recall plenty of other things too: his easy smile, his confidence, his wry humor, the friendliness laced with the obvious interest that he barely bothered to hide as his dark brown gaze swept you from tip to toe.

Thancred, nervous? Around you?

But the thought, once it has crossed your mind, won’t leave you, so even as you smile and laugh you find yourself searching for other context clues. His hand rests a few ilms away from the small box of chocolates he’d brought along, but it keeps drifting towards the empty space between the edge of the table and his knee. That, you realize, is the place where his gunblade would normally sit braced against a table leg or an empty chair. No doubt all the better for him to be ready at a moment’s notice, in case of a sin eater attack.

Or even some other, older call to arms: be they Garleans or primals. Old habits die hard.

Musing upon this for a moment or so, your own gaze trailing back to the stiffness in his limbs, and understanding dawns upon you. What with the rather hasty nature of your own arrival, you hadn't really realized how isolated Thancred has been, in part because of the strange way time flows across the Rift. Truth be told, even were it not for that, it just hasn’t felt as though there’s been time for what has at times seemed a rather frivolous pursuit in the great scheme of things. Norvrandt has been in a state of emergency for so long that the chance to slow down and take a breath, take any personal moments for yourselves, let alone time for prolonged intimacy, is both exhilarating and intimidating.

You can only imagine how he must feel. As time is reckoned in the First, it's been five years since he arrived, after all- and he’s been alone for a great deal of that time. All the smooth words and playful rejoinders that used to flow as easily from his lips as water in a mountain spring probably feel farther away than ever.

Perhaps somewhat on impulse, you reach across the table, ignoring your half-finished dinner, and cover his hand with yours. It’s warm and its weight is comforting, his skin ever so slightly rough to the touch.

The gesture catches his attention, those soft brown eyes flaring just slightly, giving you for the moment the impression of a startled doe- not that he is anything so innocent. You chuckle to yourself aloud at the imagery, and beneath your light and encouraging touch you feel some of that tension flow out of him.

“Did I say something?” he asks. His grin is warm. It’s still not what it used to be; it lacks the cocksure edge that you remember from your early adventuring days. But maybe that isn’t such a bad thing.

“No. I was just thinking,” you choose your words carefully, not cynically but with the desire to put recent events aside for the nonce, “how very handsome you look tonight.”

He rewards you with a blush at the tips of his ears, one that is surprising and most becoming. You can’t help a soft laugh, one which he answers in kind, his dark eyes twinkling-

-and ah, you think, there it is. The mischief that you remember. It hasn’t left him entirely, not yet.

Absent the others, or any present and immediate dangers to overcome, Thancred seems more like his old self, and you cannot but wonder if it’s at least in part due to your presence. You would like to think so.

You relax at last, then, and so does he. The evening proceeds apace with wine and long conversation as the two of you, in a sort of subconscious and mutual accord, discuss everything except Scions business- and little by little you find that you have yourself fallen into old (and very comfortable) habits.

Opportunity presents itself in due course: he takes your arm and asks with a certain cheekiness if he might walk you home. You agree, with a flutter of anticipation settling low in your belly.

You had been hoping it might come to this, after all.

~*~

You had heard once upon a time, an anomaly amongst the many rumors garnered from eavesdropping, that Thancred could hold his breath for upwards of ten minutes.

It had seemed improbable, to say the least, so naturally you had to ask him if it was true. With a wide and decidedly devious smile that spoke of pure sin, he had said he might be willing to indulge your curiosity. It was your turn to flush, then, as you realized why that was a rumor in the first place. Certainly it had naught to do with swimming (as you’d rather innocently assumed, at first).

But you were not without certain skills of your own - so you had countered, with a smirk and a remark to that effect. That was the first night you had him, and he had made good on his word. Then, and many times since.

After all that’s transpired in the last five weeks, it might as well have been five years in truth, upon Source and shard alike. But perhaps that is immaterial, for you have him again at last: pinned against the mattress of your well-appointed guest bed in the Pennants, his fine dress shirt still on but half-unbuttoned. You can feel your smile as you kiss him, pressed sweetly against lips that are still as soft and supple as you remember.

His hands rest upon your thighs, still clad in the new leggings you’d purchased for this occasion, and the warmth of them radiates through the thin fabric. It’s passing strange to you, feeling such mortal warmth from a body that is technically little more than a projection - not unlike the Ascians against whom you and your companions have battled for so long.

But the man beneath you still casts his thoughts elsewhere, even while he lies in your bed. You can see his interest in lightly flushed cheeks and dark eyes perhaps slightly wider than usual, but you can also sense his hypervigilance, that readiness to spring into action, and you pause to ask if aught is amiss.

His snowy brows lift and you watch a parade of emotions make their way across his handsome face. Surprise, followed by guilt, followed by that smile flickering back to life like embers that have not quite cooled- but this time the tilt of it is lopsided. Self-deprecating. Sheepish.

“I should have known you would notice,” he says, and you murmur your agreement, trailing the path of your lips to the corners of his mouth as if to capture the words with your tongue. You sense he has more to say so you withdraw, only an ilm or two, enough to give him space. “It’s- … so much time has passed. For me, that is. I-”

Whatever he had meant to say trails off in a frustrated sigh. You sit up and he props himself up on his elbows in turn, to study you. Regret for time gone and time wasted lurks in the darkness of his eyes, ghosts that you know all too well. They rest uneasy when they rest at all.

You say nothing, only wait.

“... Five years. And I��ve thought of almost nothing but Minf-... Ryne, for most of it.” You do not remark upon the correction, for it is made without any rancor. Whatever resentment he bore for the situation appears to have passed. “You needed my strength, and I… was too wrapped in my own problems to notice until it was almost too late. How can you sit here and....”

“Seduce you?” you supply helpfully.

Alarm, or something like it, darkens his features, and you grin at him, a smile that widens the longer he stares at you. You don’t really know why you suddenly find yourself laughing, but something about the moment feels so absurd you just can’t help yourself.

After a minute or two of confused silence, Thancred joins in, and the sound of your combined mirth breaks the tension at last.

You press your lips to his again. And again, and again, until guilt is the last thing on his mind or yours. He’s pretty as a picture disarmed thus, with his half-lidded smoulder and the return of that flush, blooming like spring roses across the apples of his cheeks. One of his hands pets your nape from where it has tangled in your hair.

“I brought you chocolates,” he says weakly, chuckling. “For Valentione’s.”

The chocolates in question sit neatly on the long table where once the Exarch had supplied you with an army’s ransom of sandwich baskets, a few ilms away from his longcoat which he had draped over the wooden surface. You idly wonder what he must have said to the artisan, or if he had explained anything about the Eorzean custom at all.

“I didn’t want you to think I’d forgotten about-”

You stifle his attempts at further explanation with another kiss: this one much longer and deeper, your tongue gently but firmly seeking past parted lips to entwine with his. His hand twitches, grasping on instinct for purchase before cupping the back of your neck and slipping beneath your collar.

Eventually you emerge, taking in night air and savoring the taste of red wine and tenderness.

“Are you certain?” he whispers. Both hands now linger at your hips, toying with the hem of your shirt.

You answer him when you gather handfuls of fabric and lift, tossing the article of clothing in the vague direction of the table before returning to the warmth and surety of his touch.

Tomorrow is the Empty. Another foray into the unknown, and more questions. More uncertainty. Very likely, more danger- that is just the nature of things as a Scion of the Seventh Dawn, these days, and he knows the way of it as well as you do. But tonight belongs to a long-overdue reunion, to a warm bed shared beneath the diamond wheel of the stars, and to a connection that has surpassed the boundaries of space and of time.

An ardor of a thoroughly mortal sort- and all the sweeter for its transience.

#chrysalispen writes #thancred waters #thancred x wol #valentione's 2020

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